Take Your Time

The past month has been exasperating and exhilarating.  Cataract surgery has evolved to such an amazing "science", the procedure is commonplace and takes less time than brewing a pot of coffee.  I was very, very fortunate to have as my surgeon, one of the best in the NE.  Matter of fact, he is the doctor who patented the tool that makes the 'stitchless' surgery possible.  Eye  #1, the left, had suffered a serious injury nearly 40 years ago, which probably resulted in my need for cataract surgery at such a "young" (relatively speaking) age.  Of course, once one eye was thusly corrected, the other also needed to be done so I had a matched pair!  With just a small cataract, it could have waited a long time were it not for the vast difference in my vision after the first surgery.


So, right eye surgery was done two days ago.  The day following that surgery, that eye read the 20/20 line on the eye chart.  The left eye, one month later, is about 20/25.  I am very grateful ... and I have a lot  of work to do.  My entire world has changed and now I need to learn to function within it.


I've had poor vision and worn corrective lenses since 3rd grade.  I could always see close up, however ... one of those people who take their glasses off to do close work.  Now, I  see well from an arms' length away and farther, but the close up stuff is all a blur.  I will need reading glasses I'm sure ... but how will this new vision affect my picture-taking?  Auto-focus, no problem.  But often, I want to manually focus the lens to capture the image I WANT, not that to which the camera defaults.  Another learning process to be sure.  "Take your time", my husband says. 


I wonder if he knows how relevant that phrase is?  I have been marveling at the way I am able to see ~ it's like everything is new to me!!  Walking down stairs without a spacial divide; seeing the clock when I wake up without first reaching for glasses; chopping vegetables without having to keep my head at a "just so" angle to see through the bifocal.  It's all so new, so different.  Too much for my brain to immediately comprehend, I will have to learn this new way of seeing.   


When my eyes and my brain have once again found their harmony, I intend to go places, do more, see more, and live more than I have allowed myself to do in decades. I don't want to squander this gift I have been given.  I am going to take "MY" time ~ to be outdoors, to visit family and friends, to photograph the ordinary and the extraordinary, and to see the every-day world around me.  I rather feel like Scrooge after the visitation of the ghosts ... giddy with anticipation of all that awaits me!!  


Yes, this is indeed "MY TIME"; an amazing and unexpected gift of new sight that has also brought further insight.  We live but once ... I do not want my legacy to be of having seen every speck of dirt or dust bunny that needed tending in a house that will be standing long after my mortal self has passed on.  Life is too precious and fleeting to sequester oneself in a rut, no matter how well intended.  Take on a new challenge .... no matter how small! This is the only earthly life you get as far as I know, so live it:  see it, feel, it, smell it ... eat it up!   Get out ... take a hike, take a picture, take a trip ...  Take YOUR time ♥

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The soul would have no rainbow 

if the eyes had no tears

Somewhere, over the Rainbow...

Hindsight is always 20/20.  That’s a very common statement, and 100% accurate.  


Yesterday, I went to a meeting that would ordinarily bring me tremendous joy and excitement.  For some strange reason, instead, I felt more and more drained.  My vision, improving since the surgery and far better than it had been in 50 years, seemed cloudy.  I was physically and emotionally spent.


At just about 5PM EDT (4PM central), my husband phoned with his usual end of the day “do you need anything from the store on my way home?“  call.  I didn’t ~ we spoke only a minute or two.  Hanging up, I felt my energy slide to the point that I had to go sit down on the couch.  I hadn’t the energy to even make supper, even though it only consisted of heating up chili and boiling pasta.  For some unexplained reason, Michael came home and took over the making of the meal, without complaint or question.  I had to push myself to log on line, but I had to catch up with a fundraising effort I had initiated that was to end. I maintained my lighthearted banter, but something just didn’t feel right.  


Last evening, all of a sudden, I felt an amazing “whoosh” of energy fill my body.  I was rejuvenated in a heartbeat, and ended up staying up far past my bedtime researching antiques I had brought home from my earlier meeting.  As much as I love my Facebook friends and bear research, I didn’t check in on those pages last night.  


This morning, I learned the sad news that one of Lily the Black Bear’s cubs, little Jason, had passed on … at 4:03PM Central time.  He was the smaller of the two cubs born in January.


In hind sight, I believe my spiritual connection with these bears and their researchers,  and Mother Nature were impacting my personal being yesterday afternoon.  And when my energies became renewed, invigorated, I believe it had to do with Jason’s spirit being set free to live ever after in the land  of the angels.  


The spirit, mind, body connection is amazing in its’ depth and scope.  If you will allow yourself to feel it, to trust in those feelings, you will be rewarded, humbled, and you will hurt.  I ache with the loss on this plane, of that beautiful little bear cub.  I was connected to him for nearly three months on this planet, but forever he will live in my heart.  


The power of the bear is much stronger than the mortal body in which it is seen in our earthly world.  Godspeed, JasonBear. You taught the world lessons, only you ever had the ability to teach. Your reward is a wild and free life in the here-after, where no bullets fly. My heart breaks, but your spirit soars. I must rejoice in that knowledge. Your short life strengthened the bear spirit within me, and I will be forever grateful, even in the pain and sadness of the loss.  Via Con Dios … “until we meet again”.

Thank you, Randy Repichowski, for allowing me the use of this graphic today....

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Unknown Speaker addressing the 

National Congress of American Indians in the mid 1960's

"In early days we were close to nature. We judged time, weather conditions, and many things by the elements--the good earth, the blue sky, the flying of geese, and the changing winds. We looked to these for guidance and answers. Our prayers and thanksgiving were said to the four winds--to the East, from whence the new day was born; to the South, which sent the warm breeze which gave a feeling of comfort; to the West, which ended the day and brought rest; and to the North, the Mother of winter whose sharp air awakened a time of preparation for the long days ahead. We lived by God's hand through nature and evaluated the changing winds to tell us or warn us of what was ahead.
Today we are again evaluating the changing winds. May we be strong in spirit and equal to our Fathers of another day in reading the signs accurately and interpreting them wisely. May Wah-Kon-Tah, the Great Spirit, look down upon us, guide us, inspire us, and give us courage and wisdom. Above all, may He look down upon us and be pleased."